Mr. Turner - Another Film I Couldn't Finish...

April 4, 2015, 3:22 pm

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Mr. Turner (2014)

I have to ask, did this film really need to be 2 and a half hours long? I stopped watching about an hour in and we still had as yet to see any kind of story. Certainly seeing a visit from William Turner's illegitimate family was quite an interesting scene, as was the visit from Mary Somerville, a contemporary scientist. But in neither of those scenes is William Turner the most interesting element. In one scene it is revealed that Turner has a horrendous singing voice in a scene unconnected to any wider narrative and yet strangely the film seems to expect me to be moved by the song, while I listen to his interminable rendition.



There's a whole scene depicting Turner renting out a flat in Margate, only for Turner to immediately return to London. Why?



My main takeaway from a whole hour sitting and watching this film is that William Turner was a wholly uninteresting figure who liked to make regular reference to Greek myths.



The way the film captures the period is great. Timothy Spall is a fantastic performer and does the best possible job with the material. But I like some drama along with the costumes in my costume dramas and there is simply no drama here for Spall to convey. Mike Leigh's general trend in his films is to promote naturalism above story, so we get to watch Turner milling about, waiting and hoping that something will happen that thrills us. This is the Paranormal Activity of costume dramas. A film where we are waiting to spot something interesting because there is no story to invest in.

Ungraded

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Happy Chocolate Egg Day!

April 5, 2015, 6:59 am

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Hope everyone is enjoying this annual celebration of chocolate! :)


As a side-note, in case anyone isn't already familiar with cavalorn I must recommend his latest post. He's a pagan who makes a regular point of dismissing misinformation about paganism and pagan history. His topic of choice? Why the Eostre stuff is nonsense. Here's his latest entry.

"Joe" - The 'Good' Nicolas Cage Movie Of Last Year Is Actually, As It Turns Out, Pretty Good!

April 7, 2015, 3:46 pm

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Joe (2013)

This was supposed to be a Nicholas Cage movie where he actually gives a good performance for a change. And to that extent it meets the hype.



The last Nicholas Cage movie where I was really impressed by his performance was Herzog's 'Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans'. Joe provides us with a more down-to-earth and subtle performance than I'd normally expect from Cage, but not in any way a boring performance. The performances are pretty great all around here.



The problem is with the premise. While quite well presented, it's a story we've seen before. A boy with an abusive alcoholic father finds a new role model in Joe in spite of Joe's own troubled past. The story isn't entirely cliched, but there's little in the way of surprises.

B-


If you are looking for the crazier sort of Nicolas Cage performance, I can highly recommend the movie "Bad Lieutenant: Port Of Call New Orleans".


Also, I can highly recommend the Filmsack podcast on "Face/Off" which highlights his Nicolas Cage-isms in that film.

Apparently This Is Our New Joker....

April 25, 2015, 5:47 am

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Um... apparently this is Jared Leto:



This is what the Joker will be like in the "Suicide Squad" movie that is planned. Sort of like a villain team-up movie.

Naturally we know Jared Leto from Requiem For A Dream, Fight Club and most recently from his amazing performance in Dallas Buyer's Club.

But I actually found, looking at this image, that I couldn't help but think of his performances in his band "30 Seconds To Mars". He's capable of going from extremely quiet and fragile to manic and sort of hyperactive. And the way his voice sounds in live performances has always stuck with me....


(video link)


(video link)

Afflicted - Possibly The Best Found Footage Horror Film.... Ever!

April 26, 2015, 11:46 am

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Afflicted (2013)

The found footage genre gets a bit of a bad rep. The most well known examples do the genre a bit of a disservice.

Here are some of the most well known examples:


1. Blair Witch Project
It was sold as a terrifying scare-fest, but it's more of a low budget horror with comedy elements and saves its creepy payoff til the very end.


2. Cloverfield
Actually a pretty cool monster movie, but significantly let down by its annoying characters and bizarrely persistant cameraman. (There are clear points where interest in his on safety should have led him to put down the camera.) If those elements don't bug you, there's a lot to like and arguably Cloverfield is still the best American Godzilla movie.


3. Paranormal Activity
I only saw this fairy recently. It is, of course, one of the first things people think of when they think of found footage. It's every bit as dull as I feared it would be, following the Blair Witch Project formula rather less effectively (not least because the characters are less well formed with wholly confused motivations). (My review is here.)


4. VHS
I haven't seen the third one yet. The first entry was a mixed bag, like most anthology movies. However, the VHS films, with their short films which fairly consistently outshine the stupid wraparound segment, actually do a pretty great job at pushing the boundaries with the found footage style. It could do with being a little more consistent, but VHS2 is actually a must-see.

But what about the really great found footage films which have mostly gone under the radar?


1. The Rec films: a set of Spanish zombie movies. While pretty big cult hits your average moviegoer is more likely to have seen the godawful remake "Quarantine".


2. Troll Hunter: A fantastic foibd footage monster movie with spectacular effects and a wicked sense of humour, but limited distribution.


3. End of Watch: Barely even recognised as found footage because it's a rare case where the format is used for a genre other than horror. But this is pretty awesome police drama with a great central performance for the ever-brilliant Jake Gyllenhaal.


4. Chronicle: In a year when the superhero genre was solidly dominated by Marvel, this small fry found footage release was refreshingly different from the typical heroes versus global threats format. Much of the story was kids messing around with their mysterious powers and in some ways the film had more in common with Akira than the average superhero comic.

So.... back to the review...


Praise didn't seem to come thick and fast for the low profile horror release "Afflicted" and the title poster gave me the impression that this would mainly be about a guy sitting around dying of a horrible disease. The opening still leaves that as a possibility, but I'm pleased to confirm that they don't go in that direction.



As we begin "Afflicted" has a very plausible premise for the found footage. Budding filmmakers and best friends documenting a trip so they can share every moment with an internet audience. For.this part the filmmakers are basically playing themselves and they make their work look very professional so we can imagine people online taking an interest. (Unlike something like "Halloween Resurrection" where it's hard to imagine what the online audience would get out of it.)



Eventually the central storyline starts. The professional filmmaking reverts to a more in-the-heat-of-the-moment style. Just like with "Chronicle" but with a lot more spontaneous realism. This is helped by the introduction of the strap-on-cameras which can just sit at around chest height, helping to deal with the common found footage problem of "why are you still filming?" (The "go" camera was a decent solution for this problem in one segment of "V/H/S 2" and in "REC" the use of the camera as a torch/flashlight when the lights go out was a helpful explanation too.)



In "Afflicted" the performances are very natural. The effects are spectacular but made all the more impactful by the grittiness of the found footage format. The storyline moves in a very sensible and well paced fashion. And despite being precisely the kind of subject matter that is over-done in the horror genre, this is a very novel take on a well-worn topic. I won't name the focus of the horror film because it would only lead to unwarranted groans; which is unfortunate considering how wonderful the final product is.



I won't pretend that there aren't some cliches here. There are. I'll admit it. But the film as a whole is just such a joy and such a breath of fresh air for the horror genre that I cannot fault it. I love the main character, I love the gore, the pacing, the effects, as well as that general sense of fun which any good horror leaves out at their peril.



Not convinced about found footage? Don't think "Troll Hunter" counts because it's a faux-documentary? Then this may well be the one to make you re-think your position. This is must-see for ALL horror fans.

A+

Three Recent Releases I Went To See....

April 29, 2015, 3:10 pm

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The Voices (2014)

I was really surprised to hear that Marjane Satrapi, the writer of the graphic novel "Persepolis" about her own experiences growing up in the midst of the Islamic Revolution in Iran (and director of the movie of the same name), was going to be directing a black comedy starring Ryan Reynolds. The premise? A seemingly good natured man chooses what to do based on what he is told by his dog and his cat - and things get out of hand.



I hadn't really seen Ryan Reynolds' comic talents before. I'd seen "Buried", which had a pretty serious tone, though I thought the film was pretty cool. I'd also seen "Blade Trinity" where the jokes were both written and delivered poorly (something I'm inclined to blame on writer/director David S. Goyer, currently working on writing the new "Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Stupidest Title Ever").



Gemma Arteton seems like a different person in every movie and it's a pity none of her movies is really making her the star she deserves to be since she's appeared in some pretty great films: "The Disappearance of Alice Creed", "Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters", "Byzantium". She's absolutely brilliant here.



I'm still not entirely sold on Anna Kendrick, but she's perfectly capable here. The third girl in the accountacy office, played by Ella Smith, really felt like she deserved a larger contribution to the story. They dress her down in the movie somewhat, but it's still clear that she's utterly gorgeous and it felt odd to me that she's portrayed as the "less attractive one" purely because she's a bit more chunky.


Ella Smith. Not an image from the movie "The Voices", but I think you get the point.

But it must be admitted that Ryan Reynold's performance (along with his two animal companions) really does hold the film together. He has great timing here and is a really convincing comic lead. (All the more so when you consider that he does all the animal voices too.)



The film doesn't seem entirely sure how to end, but it finishes in a sufficiently appealing off-the-wall fashion to make up for this.

A+


John Wick (2014)

We already knew Keanu Reeves was best in action movies from his excellent turn as the villain in Man Of Tai Chi. He's now received a great deal of praise for his lead performance here as an ex mafia hitman who decides to come out of retirement.



Unfortunately I don't think John Wick meets the hype. The problem is not Keanu. He doesn't have any more range than normal, but this is a more suitable role for him than most. The real problem is the rather contrived and unconvincing plot.



Early on we have a 'safe zone' of sorts for crime figures, which is an interesting enough concept. However, the idea that such a place wouldn't have bullet proof windows is just stupid. There's also that annoying trope where the bad guy catches the protagonist and then doesn't kill him. It's a pretty egregious use of the trope here too since John Wick's mythology as an unstoppable badass has been built up so much than it's hard to imagine anyone taking any risks with him.



There are some cool appearances from actors from The Wire and the Russian gangster who makes the mistake of the stirring John Wick out of retirement is played by Alfie Allen from Game Of Thrones. But none of their roles are written all that well.



The action sequences are cool, but as the plot moves on it becomes less and less compelling and, as a result, so do the action sequences, no matter how well choreographed the might be.

D+


Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

The latest instalment in the Marvel franchise was the most anticipated, so it shouldn't be surprising to hear that it doesn't really meet the hype.



Anyone can practically tell from his name that the character of Ultron is an evil robot. While I don't necessarily expect originality from Marvel films, this is a really uninspiring take on the evil robot trope.

A rather more petty complaint I have about Ultron is that his metal lips have a lot more movement than you'd expect from metal. It makes him come off as unreal and cartoonish. Still, the part is written comically, and James Spader does about as good a job as could be hoped for with the role.



As per usual there's a tie-in from a previous film. This tie instead of Loki it is Loki's staff. Loki's staff apparently contains the makings of artificial intelligence. So Tony Stark and Bruce Banner both decide that creating an advanced AI from an evil staff is a really good idea. Sound like nonsense? Well it is.



Anyway some other great performances other than Spader include the first ever live action performance from Paul Bettany (normally confined to voice acting for the character of Jarvis). He brings a real gravitas to hiatus role even though the role felt a little daft to me, being unfamiliar with the comics.



There's also the best performance we've ever seen from Renner in a Marvel movie. His character is fleshed out properly for a change here. Also amusingly there's a bit where Renner seems to just be speaking as himself: "This is all crazy!" He tells us, "Look, I've got a bow and arrow. See? Crazy!"

But still these are the same characters we've been following and I can't help but feel some affection. We still get some funny moments and, in spite of an annoying number of quick cuts, the action is still pretty fun.



But when your main baddie has an evil plan best explained by a shrug and a "well that's what evil robots always want in these films right?" it's really not a good sign - even if everything surrounding that central rotten core is simply scrumptious.



One last thing though: "X-Men: Days of Future Past" had the better Quicksilver.

B-

The Avengers Owes It All To.... Masters Of The Universe? It All Makes Sense! (Funny Video)

May 2, 2015, 1:44 am

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(video link)

I've always loved "Masters Of The Universe". Never really thought these films were similar before (and they aren't really, but there are some rather neat similarities all the same - and we all already knew that He-Man and Thor are basically the same character). Just one thing though: Was Frank Langella trying to do an English accent for Skeletor? I'd never realised that....





P.S. Also got to quickly point out the funniest movie-related thing I've seen in a long time. shadowcat67 has posted the trailer of a movie called "Roar" where they tried to film a jolly little comedy about people hanging about with lions and yet didn't bother to hire animal trainers. Eeeep!

Three More Reviews: Resident Evil 5, Gone Girl, Starred Up

May 4, 2015, 2:34 pm

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Resident Evil 5: Retribution (2012)

I never got around to reviewing this before because quite frankly I couldn't be bothered.



In spite of how bad Resident Evil 4 was, I still wanted to see what happened next. I have an odd fascination with these films. This is partly because I think Milla Jovovich is one of the best action stars out there. Luc Besson films like "The Fifth Element" and partly because I find the world of Resident Evil so compelling (particularly since the third film, where the Highlander director took a stab at it).



There is absolutely no story here and I get a clear impression that Paul WS Anderson would rather be making an Alien movie.



Without a clear story it's difficult to get invested in the videogame style fighting, but Jovovich has the talent to pull me into the threadbare story. There are no real characters and even Jovovich's protagonist Alice receives little development, but her dominance on screen keeps her interesting. And while not exactly "The Matrix", there were admittedly a few genuine wow moments during the action sequences. Still, overall the film is barely watchable and for any good moments there are seemingly hours of waiting while my brain evaporates. It's trash and it's not even good by the standards of the Resident Evil series, but I did at least find it rather more bareable than the previous entry.

E+



Gone Girl (2014)

David Fincher became a name to follow for me after the films "Se7en" and "Fight Club" blew me away and his earlier films "The Game" and "Alien3" similarly stunned me with his unique aesthetic. But after "Fight Club" I haven't really enjoyed any of Fincher's films. I even gave "Zodiac" a second go, only to find myself rediscovering how boring and annoyingly disjointed the film is with each scene.



Gone Girl did not start well by introducing me to Ben Affleck's protagonist character and his sister by having them prattle on with a lot of private jokes and zero charisma. I pretty much spent the first half of this film hating everyone.



There's a pretty interesting twist in the second half and I might have been impressed... had I not already seen Proxy. It'd be a spoiler to explain the connection between these two films, but essentially I felt Proxy was by far the more engaging of the two.



Proxy is a pretty dark film which becomes wonderfully mad in the second half. Gone Girl is a fairly bland crime mystery which goes a bit mad in the second half to try and make itself interesting. As great as Rosamund Pike is, she cannot save the film from its tiresome first half.

C-


Starred Up (2013)

I ranted about this so much when I first saw this that I was convinced I'd already written the review. Look, I don't know all that much about the prison system admittedly, but there's much that is clearly fake here, even to the average Joe (like myself).



For one thing, the prisoners seem to be allowed to do whatever they want. The explanation is perhaps that the prison is supposed to be enormously corrupt. After all, at one point a prison guard delivers contraband because someone else is unable to do so. It actually looked like he was delivering drugs to a cell. So, if things are really THAT corrupt, why isn't that the central storyline? Why isn't that important here and why are we in the audience just supposed to take such extreme corruption for granted?



The central role is a younger prisoner who is known for being violent and troublesome. Early on in the film we see him get into a fight and then we see a scene reminiscent of many scenes in the movie "Bronson" where force has to be used to get him into restraints. Quite bizarrely, the struggle with this central prisoner leads to him capturing a prison guard's balls between his teeth.



Upon seeing this initial display of violence from our protagonist, we then see another adult insist that his therapy programme can transform his behaviour. So annoyingly there's a central "Dangerous Minds"-esque storyline going on here. A teacher-figure wants to help, he makes progress so quickly and easily that it completely defies all suspension of disbelief and, of course, the authorities aren't happy with his methods.



What IS done well here, however, is the relationship between our protagonist and his father, who is staying in the same prison. The one very true-to-life element of the film is where the father cannot even bring himself to sit down in a circle for a discussion group without making a fuss. The father finds himself humiliated by the idea that his son is now less socially inept than himself. The performances from both father and son were very impressive and the scene is very powerful for this reason.



Unfortunately the film needs a climax and it provides one by making it's obnoxious central character into a martyr. I had a similar problem with "Kid With A Bike" (which at least had a relateable lead character). There is nothing about the lead character in "Starred Up" which made me empathise with him. He is an utterly horrible figure and the attitude he displays seems true to life. It's clear from the start that there are other prisoners who think he will only cause trouble, so even if they wanted to make him an unfortunate victim, the choice to suggest that the prison guards would try to kill him was simply baffling.



"Starred Up" is a film with fantastic performances and a few very impressive scenes, but it's trying to play with tropes which don't fit and the decision to make us take corruption in the prison system for granted is highly frustrating. I would recommend seeing "Bronson" instead.

At least in "Bronson", while the protagonist is still obnoxious, he has an element of charm. Our protagonist here is utterly charmless and the film has to pull some pretty lame tricks to try to convince us to care and, personally, I found those tricks were ineffective.

D-

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Reviews! Interesting Sci-Fi Film, Silly Evangelical Christian Film and Excellent Black Comedy

May 11, 2015, 4:27 pm

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Predestination (2014)

I was drawn to this title because it's another film from the Sperig Brothers. They made a film called "Daybreakers" a few years back about a future where the world is taken over by vampires. Their debut film before that was "Undead", an action comedy movie about both zombies and aliens.



This time they bring us this simple sci-fi film, or as simple as you can be when your story involves time travel. Appropriately enough, the world we are introduced to also involves an alternate timeline. The alternate timeline elements in the background are more than a little jarring. We are introduced to a world with an advanced futuristic space travel program, but with 50s gender politics. While this kind of anachronism is potentially very interesting, I mostly found it frustrating. Then again, I've never been much of a "Mad Men" fan either.



Sarah Snook is very impressive in her central role and I would like to see her in more things. Ethan Hawke, on the other hand, feels a little out of place. We start the film watching these two having a long leisurely discussion in a bar where Sarah Snook is describing his/her backstory and Ethan Hawke is making chit chat in a rather smug and unnatural way. This is why I don't think I could handle Linklater's "Before..." series of films. The idea of sitting around listening to Ethan Hawke have a 'spontaneous' discussion about life and philosophy sounds like a wholly appealing proposition.



Still the basic sci-fi story here, while not the spectacular action-packed story I'd hoped for, is very solid. It's a good story with great performances and interesting ideas. The world in which it takes place never quite feels real and it's a story lacking in excitement, but it's a good film well worth checking out.

B-





The Cross And The Switchblade (1970)

This is not the sort of film I would usually decide to watch, but there was something strangely fascinating about it. This is apparently a priest's own impression of how he helped to convert young gang member Nicky Cruz to evangelical Christianity and how, together, they were able to help many young people change their lives. This definitely happened, but it's pretty clear that it didn't happen quite like we see here.



Much of the film feels like a public service announcement and perhaps that shouldn't be all that surprising. This is not far removed from the Chick Tracts, little cartoon strips used to convince people to join Christianity, in the way it simplifies the situation always single-mindedly pushing the Christian religion.



The acting isn't great, the style is very cheesy and the special effect used to portray Cruz's conversion is utterly laughable. The music however, is really funky. One of the few elements which hasn't dated like a bowl of fruit left out in the sun all summer. And there's actually an odd sort of charm in some areas.



The film is utterly stupid, but it's definitely not as bad as I'd expected. Mind you, I wasn't expecting much.

D-




Man Bites Dog (1992)

Watching this black and white Indie film about a documentary crew following the progress of a cogent self-aggrandising serial killer, naturally my thoughts turned to "Behind The Mask: The Rise Of Leslie Vernon". Except there's an odd reversal here. Leslie Vernon was, in some ways, an impossible character, satirising the slasher genre by pointing out its more bizarre trends. The documentary crew, by contrast, were pretty ordinary. Here the central character is frighteningly real and the bizarre element is to have him boasting about his violent exploits to an appreciative team of documentary filmmakers.



While Leslie Vernon feels like a ridiculous fantasy, the rantings of the central character here feel all too close to what you might expect to hear from a genuine psychopath, or even simply a genuine bigot.


Before putting the film on I ended up accidentally peeking at a scene mid-way through. I was a little put off by my first impression of the central character with his odd expressions and mannerisms captured in fuzzy black and white. As it turns out, black and white works very well with the gritty subject matter. Also, while the central character has moments where he makes very weird facial expressions (most often when drunk) he has plenty of moments where he seems creepily rational. His reasons for killing involve typical selfish and bigoted drives expressed in a very down-to-earth way. Most creepy of all is when we see that this utter scumbag is a fan of music and plays the piano.



Man Bites Dog is a shocking and very darkly comic film forcing viewers to confront this monstrous character head on. The audience becomes almost as complicit as the camera crew who avidly follow the protagonist's horrifying exploits.

A+

Review of "Mad Max: Fury Road" + All The Other Mad Max Movies Too...

May 18, 2015, 3:54 pm

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Went to see the latest Mad Max movie last weekend. I'd only seen Mad Max 2 (sometimes known as "Road Warrior") and my friend had only seen "Beyond Thunderdome" (the third movie). After checking out the latest instalment we went on to watch all the Mad Max movies, so I'm all caught up on this crazy franchise now....


Mad Max: Fury Road (2015)

For the first time we get some neat little glimpses at Max's state of mind. We see his visions of the people he has failed to save in the post-apocalyptic wasteland.



I heard there wasn't much CG used here. Clearly that is utter nonsense. But what certainly is true, is that the CG is done very well and is blended with a lot of practical stunt work. Claiming that Mad Max Fury Road doesn't use CG is like saying that Jurassic Park didn't use CG, but similarly to Jurassic Park they know when to use CG and when to actually build the special effects (and admittedly they DO build a remarkable amount of stuff).



A lot of careful work went into the editing to make sure all the action was clearly captured. There are a few points where the quick cuts can get a little jumbled, but that is only when there is a huge amount of chaos to capture. Even at the least clear moments the careful planning in the editing is readily apparent.

There's no unnecessary hanging around and speech-making at the end. That admittedly makes the ending a little flat, but it's arguably preferable to cheesy sentimentality.



Mad Max Fury Road is an action-packed chase movie, filled with inventive character designs and doing an excellent job furthering the Mad Max mythology.

I found a particular highlight was the vehicle carrying a huge wall of amplifiers and a guitarist whose electric guitar is also a flame thrower. Whenever he appeared it always brought me to joyful laughter. Much of the exuberant over-the-top action made laughter the only sensible response. Like the concept, the action sequences are deliciously crazy.



Performances are great all round. Charlize Theron and Nicholas Hoult are on top form. I'm not certain what Tom Hardy was aiming for with the voice he uses in this role, but his facial expressions ensure that at important moments Max's character is very readable and relateable.



Believe the hype. It must have been five years ago when a friend pooh-poohed the idea of a Mad Max 4, asserting that they'd essentially made the same film three timed already and we didn't need them to make it again. If this film was bad it would be easily dismissed. Fury Road has gained it's hype by being worthy of it. Find out for yourself.

A+



Mad Max (1979)

Well that's quite a contrast from entries 2 and 4 in this series. While there is admittedly a pretty cool set of stunt crashes in the early part of the movie, this is mostly pretty dull. There's no exciting post-apocalyptic setting here, except perhaps that the police that (Judge Dredd style) are based in the "halls of justice".



The story is filmed in a very disjointed fashion. The cheesy music sounds like it comes from the Batman TV series, completely undermining the drama. Also some of the scenes drag horrendously badly.



The intro to Mad Max 2 is like the most misleading trailer ever, not least because it makes it sound like this is actually a Mad Max film. This has Mel Gibson, Max's car, a few lines indicating that Max thinks he might go mad if he stays out on the roads with the gangs and Max's name in the title. Apart from those few elements it's almost unrecognisable as a Mad Max movie.

D-



Mad Max: Road Warrior (1981)

It seems that I've already reviewed this film, but naturally I couldn't miss it out if I was going to catch up on the Mad Max movies I'd missed.



It's still a lot of fun and Mel Gibson is still remarkably bland in the lead role. However, on a second watch there were several elements which actually improved in my estimation.



I'd never known before how much of the post-apocalyptic Mad Max aesthetic began with this sequel. The first movie certainly wasn't post-apocalyptic. Max's wife and child casually enjoy an ice cream cone in that movie! Until recently seeing the first film I'd never been able to fully appreciate how much of the whole mythology of Mad Max began in the second film. The opening which claims to be bringing us up to speed is very misleading about the content of the previous instalment.



Another element which impressed me more this time around was the incredible stunt work. Seeing what was achieved in Fury Road with more up to date technology and a significant raise in budget, I could more fully appreciate how much work must have been required to make the big climax in the third act so effective.



It also occurred to me... That flying machine doesn't REALLY fly, does it? Because goodness knows it often seems very much like that thing is flying. This film does an amazing job of encouraging the viewer to suspend their disbelief.

Mel Gibson's Mad Max has almost no lines at the beginning of the film and the film is better off for it. It's interesting how Max is almost like an anti-hero. He's only reluctantly the hero of the story, nagged by an unwanted conscience.



I'd heard that Fury Road must directly follow from this film because Mad still has his car, the Interceptor. But that car is completely written off here. The car in Fury Road surely can't be the same one? In any case, the children which haunt his dreams in Fury Road must surely be from Beyond Thunderdome?



Mad Max 2: Road Warrior is a classic science fiction film inspiring a whole series of new crazy tropes. It's a must see for sci-fi fans. And don't be misled; the first movie isn't sci-fi and you aren't missing anything if you skip straight to this sequel.

A+



Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome (1985)

The much maligned third film in the series continues the same sort of inventiveness of the second film and while it gets goofy at times (just like the first movie did) it is never boring (like the first movie was).



The title is a bit odd considering that the Thunderdome fight is over and done with about half way into the film. Still I actually really enjoyed the rivalry between Aunty and Master Blaster and I've actually seen an episode of Invader Zim inspired by the fight on bungee chords in the dome. I also liked the satire surrounding the children in the broken down aeroplane who have formed a whole cultural and almost religious tradition around waiting for adults to return.



Unfortunately the final third of the film features a cartoonish version of the chase scene in Road Warrior, this time centred around a train instead of a tanker, and with little sense of any real threat.



The introduction of the train comes out nowhere, but then again many of the ideas in Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome come out of nowhere. This is a highly inventive film and much of it is very fun. A little bit messy, but an enjoyable mess with much to recommend it. This could have been a lot better, but what we get is certainly a film worth watching.

B-

Young Scandanavian Punks, 80s Kids With Video Nasties, A Martial Arts Sequel And A Jon Ronson Script

May 22, 2015, 1:45 pm

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We Are The Best (2013)

A group of early secondary school girls, refusing to believe that punk is dead, start their own punk band. Even though they have no idea how to play their instruments, their enthusiasm makes the characters endlessly endearing.



"We Are The Best" is a fun and often very funny story elevated by its engaging characters and enthusiastic performances.



It's hard enough finding just one great child actor, never mind three of them performing such complex and well developed characters as these. What with both this and "Let The Right One In" I wonder how Scandinavia has so many excellent child actors to spare.

A+



Found (2012)

Very much a discovery thanks to Letterboxd. I first saw positive reviews of "Found" a long long while before there was seemingly any likelihood of a UK release. And when I finally put in the DVD of "Found", just the early scenes were enough to snugly envelope me in its twisted slightly off-kilter world.



Admittedly some of the acting could be a little better and the roughness occasionally threatens to betray it's budgetary limitations. But the central character's predicament is so interesting and the tension building is so well handled, that a few rough edges don't matter too much.



The one element I thought was a little clunky was the domestic violence from the father against the children. In a film which was so careful not to outright demonise a disgusting serial killer, the way the father is suddenly villainised rubbed me the wrong way.



The whole film is a love letter to the video nasty era, but also exploring the fears of the time that vhs horror films could be a corrupting influence. Part of why the characterisation of the father annoyed me so much was the surprising level of subtlety in the rest of the film. The way the younger brother reacts to his frightening discovery about his older brother is dealt with thoroughly and in a very compelling fashion.



"Found" captured my imagination and I would highly recommend it to horror fans everywhere.

A+



Warrior King 2 (2013)

Prachya Pinkaew has created some of my favourite martial arts films because he ensures that action sequences are varied, well choreographed and have a great sense of fun. (Which, and I realise I'm in a minority here, were all elements I thought were missing from "The Raid".)



Still I felt rather less wowed by Prachya Pinkaew's more recent child-geared film "The Kick" and sadly I'm similarly let down by this follow up to "The Protector" (which was known in the UK as "Warrior King").



Tony Jaa returns once again as defender of elephants, but instead of fighting animal poachers (as would actually make sense) he's fighting a team of martial arts fanatics? I think?



This team is led by the RZA who makes for an appalling villain. In fact these must be the worst villains from any Prachya Pinkaew movie.



Also, in outdoing previous movie setpieces, there are a few particularly unconvincing pieces of effects work. I tend to be pretty forgiving on this front, but there were a few too many blatantly fake explosions and not enough excitement to distract me from this.



One of the daftest elements of the previous film was the scene where Tony Jaa goes up against cyclists. That scene is done bigger and more ridiculous here, but it's somehow less impressive. And there's nothing like the scene where Tony Jaa fights his way up a set of staircases all in one take.



The first of the Protector/Warrior King movies was very moving, on top of being a highly exciting action movie with very memorable martial arts setpieces. Warrior King 2 is just a pretender to the throne.

D-



Frank (2014)

I'm quite a Jon Ronson fan to be honest. Even though the third act was stupid, I very much enjoyed the film adapting his non-fiction book "The Men Who Stare At Goats" into a comedy story. I was quite amazed when I discovered that an enormous amount of content in that film was true.



I then read his book "Them" with stories about figures like Abu Hamza, the radical Muslim cleric with a hook for a hand, and David Icke, the ex-sports commentator who claims that the world is run by lizards. (In a recent interview Ronson reckoned that Icke should have a resurgence of popularity now that his theories that many of the country's leaders were attending paedophilic parties. Then again, even a broken clock is still right twice a day.)



Now Ronson has written this film about a figure who is just as bizarre as the kinds of figures Ronson often seeks out. The central focus of the film is on an American version of Frank Sidebottom who not only wears a strange papier mache face for his act, but is psychologically unable to take it off.



Sadly Ronson's self-effacing instincts backfire. In a group of characters who are often horrible, the film encourages us to see the the protagonist as pathetic and naive. But since so many characters are horrible and the main character is hard to identify with too, I found it difficult to get involved in the drama.



There's rather too much time being quirky. At the start of the film it is hard to understand why the protagonist wants to be part of Frank's band which makes chaotic noise instead of music. It's hard to understand why he sticks with them when they fail to come up with new material. It's hard to understand why he's prepared to put up with the constant abuse, including being stabbed. And it's especially hard to understand why he doesn't give up on them entirely when things go wrong for them towards the end.



I feel like it may have been an unfortunate spoiler to have already heard the one good song the band ever plays. "I Love You All" is a great song. However, it's hard to feel emotionally involved in the performance when I actually hate them all.



Of course, some parts are very funny. It's written by Jon Ronson after all. I can see how someone else might not find themselves frustrated by the abrasive characters and the stretched out middle where the band is stuck in a cabin and much of the humour revolves around how little progress they are making. It's all perfectly well-made and acted. I just really didn't like it.

C-

Three Horror Reviews: Trains, Aliens And Creepy Sadistic Parties

June 6, 2015, 9:32 am

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Midnight Meat Train (2008)

Starts out with an absolutely outrageous horror premise. Builds up the tension expertly. Moves into an excitingly filmed climax with the camera making impossible sweeps in and out of the train carriage. Finally, after all this, we have a finale completely lacking in internal logic.



I don't think of Bradley Cooper as an exceptional actor. However, he gives a perfectly serviceable performance here.



Vinnie Jones is perfectly suited to his role which requires him to look intimidating and not to speak.



There's plenty of Clive Barker madness with lashings of gore. The train is a cool metaphor for darker side of the city normally kept hidden which our protagonist, a photographer, is trying to capture. Some Nietzschean 'staring into the abyss' is going on here.



The ending is a complete mess. It's supposed to be shocking and atmospheric, but instead feels rushed and stupid. It's not that the ending needed to be different, but simply that it needed to be more carefully and clearly explained and developed. Having the big ending dumped on us so quickly before the film waves goodbye is really unfortunate considering some of the amazing scenes beforehand.

B-

I talk about the ending of this in a comment on Letterboxd as follows. If anyone can clue me in on what the hell was going on, I'd be grateful:
So let's get this straight. The baddie at the end says something along the lines of this:
"See all these monsters? I'm going to pull out your tongue." *tug* *splat* "Now I'm going to pull out your girlfriend's still beating heart." *crunch* *heartbeat* "Now put on a suit so you can kill innocent people to feed their bodies monsters. It's the end of the world if you don't. And when you get too old we'll let someone kill you just like Vinnie Jones' character. What an exciting career opportunity eh?"
For anyone who hasn't seen it, yes I am sarcastically paraphrasing a scene which actually has very few lines indeed. But am I really the only one puzzled by all this?



Almost Human (2013)

Quite obviously low budget, but very slickly put together all the same.



In spite of a few awkward lines and a generally unpolished feel, I was mostly wowed by this film. The effects are pretty cool and well-filmed, made all the more effective by some great use of sound effects.



The story is simple but very effectively presented. The Carpenter-esque stylings worked very well for me.



The filmmakers seem to lose track of how many alien threats are on the go and the female lead seems to become a little too helpless (struggling to get up when not actually held down) in the final act. But I cannot ignore how much fun this film was.

A+

Would You Rather? (2012)

Jeffrey Combs runs a dinner party for a group of people all in desperate need of money. He's great and he's not the only cool actor in here.

Still the writing isn't great. On the one hand  the mostly fixed location limits how interesting the plot can be, though I cannot help to compare this to "Raze" which did a lot more with captives forced to compete. On the other hand even in a film about a captive being tied to a chair, films like Texas Chainsaw Massacre and, more recently, The Loved Ones, have shown that there's still plenty of scope for an exciting drama.

If you are going to put forward a story where horrible stuff happens to a group of people in one room, you need to have some interesting ideas on what to do in this room and, preferably, some kind of point to make. Essentially the story here is 'torture porn' and as cool as Jeffrey Combs might be in the lead, he cannot convince me that there's any real depth to the story.

And the 'twist' at the end is just pathetic. For all the shallowness of the plot, I was quite enjoying it when I thought it might lead somewhere. It was a real disappointment when I realised it was all going nowhere.

One last point. While Sasha Grey's small but significant role is performed just fine, she's not a strong actress and I'm fairly sure there were other actresses who could have made more of that sadistic character.

Would You Rather is about as nasty as you'd expect, with no payoff to make it worthwhile. The performances are mostly very good, particularly Jeffrey Combs and John Heard. It was surprisingly engaging for the most part and it's really sad to be let down by a lazy ending.

C-

I keep my reviews spoiler free- but there's been a request for a discussion of the end of "Would You Rather?":

Naturally by the end of the movie there are only two survivors left. *yawn*
All their attempts to escape or to mess with the format of the game have failed. *yawn*

The protagonist gets the opportunity to kill the other survivor and get the huge amount of money for her dying brother, when the alternative option provided is for them both to walk away free. Yeah, I suppose it is a bit twisted, but I was a little confused as to how they could ever allow anybody to walk from that party who had seen what actually happens there.

Anyway, she gets back home to find that, while the big "get money in exchange for doing whatever the rich douchebags want" party had been going on, her terminally ill brother had decided to commit suicide. She's got all that money and been through so much suffering, but she's lost her brother anyway. TWIST! *groan!*

So conveniently she didn't tell her brother why she was going to this thing and, having told him that whatever mysterious thing she did that night would make everything better, he took THIS opportunity to top himself. I just don't believe it. It's simply too much of a coincidence to randomly crowbar in there.

Personally? Not impressed.

Butterfly Effect Director's Cut Is Alright But Naff. Bourne Ultimatum Is Less Smart Than I Thought.

June 7, 2015, 4:31 pm

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Butterfly Effect - Director's Cut (2004)

I've never seen the theatrical version of this, but I'm informed that this is the better version.



This is a film with many of the ingredients of an excellent film. It has solid actors in central roles. I don't even think that Ashton Kutcher gives a bad performance in spite of his poor reputation. Though he feels somewhat upstaged by the boy playing him as a child. Still it's confusing that the child actor seems to swear a lot more than Ashton Kutcher does in the same role, making me wonder whether the more abrasive side to his character were being missed out of Kutcher's performance or whether this inconsistency is simply in the script.



For a film that decides to try to tackle childhood trauma and paedophilia, this is no "Mysterious Skin". The almost throwaway fashion in which childhood abuse appears here made it particularly difficult for me to ever warm to the film.



In spite of the various dark turns in the story, everything is just too glossy and too polished and the performances often feel better suited to a sit-com than a sci-fi drama. Was I supposed to hate the protagonist? The film never quite convinced me that being paralysed was worthy of a suicide attempt and it came off almost like he was horrified by how happy all his friends were. With a.different director and a different tone this script could have been made into a much better film. Imagine this as directed by David Fincher...

C-



The Bourne Ultimatum (2007)

Based on my memories my opinion on this film was mixed. I remembered some pretty exciting sequences, but the plot seemed to be practically identical to Supremacy. And surely we already know that Jason was part of a special secret agent training program? When he suddenly remembers, right at the start of the film, that he was part of a special secret agent training program, how is that any kind of impetus for the rest of the story?



Nevertheless, the opening scenes are excellent. Unfortunately once the film has finished with Paddy Considine (who, even though not at his best, is still great here), the story becomes a bit flat. Julia Stiles' scenes are clearly supposed to be much more emotionally touching and sadly, besides being pretty, she made very little impression on me.



And one more thing that bugged me this time around. A hitman perusing Bourne is injured in a car crash. Yet only a few hours later the same man is pursuing Bourne with no ill effects at all. To have Bourne limp safely away from that crash was unbelievable as it was, but to have him then being quickly pursued by a figure who was last seen immobile and bleeding, ready to be taken away in a stretcher, is really overstepping the bounds of my suspension of disbelief.



This is a solid action film and I actually love how this employs the shaky action movie camera technique. But the plot is kinda dumb. This is a switch-your-brain-off actioner masquerading as an intelligent spy thriller.

B+

Reviews! Generic Robot Movie, Slow-Paced Holocaust Movie And A Dull Directionless Western....

June 10, 2015, 10:45 am

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Automata (2014)

Asimov seems to be a tough old fruit to adapt. On the one hand there's the Will Smith action movie "I, Robot" where the whole premise seems to be that an AI has successfully ditched the three protocols. Asimov's stories generally do not do this, always demonstrating logical reasons why following the three protocols can lead to the unusual behaviour without any inconsistency.



On the other hand there's Bicentenial Man with Robin Williams where one of Asimov's larger short stories about robots is adapted pretty closely without much deviation and it leads to a fairly plain.experience, lacking in thrills.

So while Automata wasn't explicitly an Asimov adaptation, it was cool to see the same kind of robot protocols referenced and that our central protagonist in this thriller, played by Antonio Banderas, is actually an insurance man for the robotics company.



Early on we can see the potential of this film when Antonio Banderas investigates an insurance claim of a robot harming the family dog. He demonstrates that the claim is bogus by dropping a knife directly onto his hand. Here we see one of many awesome bits of effects work in this film, as the robot's lightning-fast reflexes catch the knife to keep him from harm.



Early in the film our insurance investigator is trying to uncover how robots appear to be destroying themselves when that's also against their protocols. I was hoping for a simple clever Asimovian explanation. Instead (and I'm giving a small but significant spoiler here) the answer is the typical Hollywood robot movie explanation: They've learnt to break their programming. *sigh*



Once the film becomes a typical story about the need for equality amongst equals and rebellion against oppression, with good.characters struggling against domineering evil caricatures, it all becomes very boring. And it's a pity, because there are so many wonderful ideas here. If they'd simply adapted one or two of Asimov's short stories, this would be a much more compelling script.



Wonderful actors, fantastic special effects and some clever ideas. But overall the story is cliched and the characters are bland. A real missed opportunity.

D-




Ida (2013)

There are so many holocaust films by this point that a new one really needs to do something different. To that extent, Ida is a success.



The central character is Ida, a Jewish girl raised in a nunnery deciding whether to take her vows.

The nuns insist that she meet with her aunt. She is not keen, but it turns out that her aunt became very important when Poland came under Soviet control. As such her political clout is very helpful when they seek out the bodily remains of their family.



I would have like to know more about the aunt's political past and I would have liked a bit more insight into our main character. Basically I would have liked a more interesting character-driven film.



One reviewer on Amazon complained about the placing of the subtitles on the DVD ruining a beautiful shot. (Apparently the cinema subtitles were designed to avoid this.) I have no idea what shot they were referring to and frankly if the filmmakers had focussed more on pushing toward the dialogue and less on shot composition, I might have found this a lot more engaging.

C-




The Proposition (2005)

Guy Pearce in a western seemed like a pretty neat prospect and it must be said that Ray Winstone is also very good in this. Sadly the film drags and Danny Huston's performance is really flat.



Oddly we also get the exact opposite problem with John Hurt's performance. He appears to have been asked to be as ridiculously over the top as possible and being the great actor he is, he fulfils that remit perfectly. His larger than life character draws attention to how flat and lifeless the rest of the film is.



Ray Winstone's sections of the film with Emily Watson work very well. The two of them dealing with the aftermath of Winstone's character making a proposition to Pearce's outlaw character. But when their storyline finally reunites them with that of Guy Pearce, it didn't feel worth the wait to me.



Trigger warning for the film though: There's a completely pointless r*pe in this film. What's even worse is we seem to be expected to feel sorry for the rapist afterwards.



Quite frankly, as disappointed as I was with Guy Pearce's recent film "The Rover", I found that a more satisfying watch than this.

D-

The Latest Cronenberg Film Is A Return To Form Thanks To Mia Wasikowska and Julianne Moore

June 13, 2015, 8:44 am

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Maps To The Stars (2014)

David Cronenberg has a very mixed career by this stage. He started out by making a name for himself with low budget body-horror. He then moved into bigger budget territory with mixed results due to his penchant for weirdness. He seemed to suddenly become much more mainstream with two rather more down-to-earth films (by Cronenberg standards) starring Viggo Mortensen.

So having thought Cronenberg's career had been given a second wind, I was sad to find myself let down by "A Dangerous Method" and "Cosmopolis".



While intrigued by the names Mia Wasikowska and Julianne Moore on the poster for "Maps To The Stars", Cronenberg' previous couple of films hadn't been lacking in star casting.



So after all that backstory for Cronenberg's career, let me tell you now that "Maps To The Stars" was a very welcome surprise. The two lead actresses are excellent and, even knowing very little about Hollywood, I found the satire of the script highly entertaining.



This isn't Cronenberg back at his A game. The end doesn't quite tie up as cleanly as I would like and a few points in the film left me more confused than necessary. This is clearly black humour, so I don't mind that I'm often more freaked out than laughing. But I was never bored.



Julianne Moore plays an actress in a tight spot in her career trying to resurface by remaking a film that starred her mother; except her mother was younger than her at the time. In comes Mia Wasikowska as her new assistant after a recommendation from Carrie Fisher.



The characters are very often entertainingly obnoxious and there's not really anyone we can completely side with, but everyone is interesting enough that it works out fine.

A+


I've since managed to check out a few of the Cronenberg films I previously missed....


Fast Company (1979)

I could barely believe this was a Cronenberg film. It's competent, but feels very much of its time. The characters are pretty bland and they don't have the greatest performances either. It's a simple story of a drag racing rivalry.



I'm somewhat reminded of how I felt about John Carpenter's Elvis tv movie or Nicholas Winding Refn's "Miss Marple: Nemesis". These were made just fine, but lacked the director's distinctive character. The difference is that the Elvis movie had Kurt Russell and Marple:Nemesis had several really good British actors including Richard E. Grant. Fast Company can only point to John Saxon and not at his finest hour by any means.



While certainly not offensively bad, Fast Company lacks all the panache you'd expect from a Cronenberg film and has no real standout performances at all.

D+



M Butterfly (1993)

Jeremy Irons becomes enraptured with a Chinese woman. Cue the most awkward explicit orientalism. The relationship is especially unconvincing seeing as they seem to talk about little other than how odd a relationship between them would be. Add in the slow pacing and I just couldn't bring myself to stomach any more of this.



I can imagine other people enjoying this more, but I just found it flat and dull rather than intelligent and interesting. (Perhaps check out this clip to see whether you are intrigued?)

(No rating, couldn't finish)

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Reviews of Animated Movies!: Superheroes, Rat Chefs, Boxtrolls and Mouse Police!

June 20, 2015, 11:48 am

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Ultimate Avengers 2: Rise Of The Panther (2006)

After Iron Man, but a long time before The Avengers, I saw a cheesy cartoon movie about the Avengers characters. The movie started off strong, clearly demonstrating the appeal of Captain America as an over the top patriotic hero who fights Nazis with a shield. Nazis which, it turns out, are actually working for evil aliens from outer space. This opening sequence was a lot of fun.

The film then went a bit downhill when it moved into the kind of self-righteous goofiness which regularly turns me off these sorts of comics.



In these movies Iron Man is still keeping his identity secret (in public at least), Thor doesn't seem quite as much like He-Man as he does in the movies, Ant-Man is already in the team and acts like a complete dickhead and, while he really struggles to get the Avengers to work as a team here, Captain America shows rather better leadership qualities in the cartoon version of Avengers.



With Black Panther coming soon, I wanted to check what the cheesy comicbook version was like. And wow, they are going to need to make the movie VERY different.



Black Panther is king of a less economically developed country with isolationist policies. This unelected leader lives in a gigantic palace. Oh and, like every single supehero it seems, he has daddy issues.



My suspension of disbelief is pushed to the limit when The Avengers lose a fight to the people of the Black Panther's kingdom of Wakanda - armed with spears... Later on, these same primitive tribal people have to stop an alien invasion and they make use of giant laser turrets to do so.

I'm imagining comicbook fans at this point replying, "Yes? And? Your point is?"



But that's really my point. When enjoying the Marvel Studios film series it's easy to forget how much greater levels of goofiness are taken for granted in the original comics. So I don't regret seeing this stupid film, since I will enjoy the stupid upcoming live action films all the more as a result.

D-



Ratatouille (2007)

When Brave came out off the back of the wonderous Wall-E and Up, it was viewed as a downturn in quality for the creative animation giant Pixar. And, by comparison to last couple of mega-hits I guess that accusation was pretty accurate. However, some seem to forget that Pixar haven't always been as spectacular in their storytelling as they are with their computer-generated artwork.



The obvious example is "A Bug's Life" where, if given the choice, I'd probably rather watch "Antz". I'd also point to the original "Toy Story". It's often forgotten what a revelation "Toy Story 2" was with it's amazing advance in quality from the first film. The first film was a good children's movie, but it wasn't til the sequel that the idea that Pixar movies are for everyone really began. Much to my shame, I remember laughing at someone who said they'd been to see "Toy Story 2" in the cinema.

I'm afraid, having now seen "Ratatouille", having missed it the first time around, I think it's one of Pixar's lesser efforts. The central premise of a rat that can cook is a neat little gag on its own, but it feels stretched too far over the film's length.



The villain's supposed crime is that he wants to sell foods under the old chef's brand name. Frankly I cannot really see where the harm is. Also he, quite rightly, questions the human protagonist's cooking ability and he doesn't want him claiming the restaurant just by virtue of familial relations when the 'villain' has been doing the real work keeping the restaurant going.



Okay, admittedly a villain doesn't have to be 'all bad', but it's hard to really get behind the bland one-note 'heroes' who never seem to grow as characters. And the lack of a major villain makes the heroes all the more tiresome.



And what's more, the humour is really not very consistent. There are funny bits, sure, but there are long dry spells.



Finally we have the super-mean restaurant critic apparently realising that critics are unimportant. How uninspired...



Look, I'm not saying this is a terrible film. Much of it is decent entertainment. But with the high quality we've now reached with the storylines and characters in animated films, this doesn't really compare. I can't say I'd recommend it.

C+



The Boxtrolls (2014)

Laika are going from strength to strength and I would say they are now right up with Pixar as an animation company whose name pretty much guarantees quality.



From the Neil Gaiman adaptation "Coraline", to "Paranorman" which celebrated ghosts, witches and zombies, with its own twists on all three, and finally to this parable on the dangers of fear mongering and scapegoating.



Every minute of "The Boxtrolls" is an absolute delight. The movie is visually spectacular and absolutely hilarious.



Richard Ayoade's voice is distinctive and not easily missed, but he is put to good use as a villainous henchman, continually expressing relief that he is 'one of the good guys'. (Watch out for his character's re-appearance after the credits!)



To my mind, this is the best Laika movie yet!

A+



Ernest And Celestine (2012)

From the creators of the insanely funny and bizarre "A Town Called Panic" comes this insanely cute and heart-swelling (and also very funny) animation about a bear and a mouse who become friends.



I cannot begin to detail all the wonderful elements in this film, but one of my favourite parts was definitely the mouse police.



I wonder what the dubbed version is like, since I think this film could be great for children. However, I was very satisfied with my subtitled version.

A+

The Terrible News About Fabfunk (Gabe Toro), The Movie Critic....

June 27, 2015, 8:50 am

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I had become a pretty big fan of Gabe Toro as a movie critic (known on livejournal as fabfunk), not because I agreed with his views on movies but, with higher praise, because I found his writing about films interesting. If you google for references to Gabe Toro on livejournal the vast majority of links are to my own posts.



So it with deep dismay that I reveal the reason why Gabe has disappeared from the internet. Gabe Toro has, relatively recently, pled guilty to pimping out a 14 year old girl on Craig's List and distributing pornographic images of her. This is shocking news to hear about a figure who I'd previously have considered an (online) friend. It's deeply troubling and I feel deeply sorry for the victims.



I discovered this information today while cross-posting an old review onto Letterboxd. The first link where I saw it discussed was a discussion board on Rotten Tomatoes. (Gabe does not seem to have a Rotten Tomatoes critic archive anymore, which was what I'd actually been searching for.) I was really upset to find people in the Rotten Tomatoes forum saying it came as no surprise to them. How could anyone not be surprised by this news? I think most of us prefer to imagine the best of people.



A more realistic picture of the situation came from an article on a movie website coming to terms with the news. It turns out that they had invited Gabe to speak on their podcast a number of times. It's reassuring to hear that someone who met Gabe Toro face-to-face (or at least via Skype) still thought he came across as an interesting character rather than this creepy monster that the media is now revealing. Still, the truth will out and now we know Gabe was not the same person we thought he was.

While I don't think Gabe ever actually lied to me, I still cannot help but feel betrayed.



Den of Geek have actually removed all of his contributions from their website entirely. Click here for their statement.

Noel Clarke Looks Silly As An Action Hero, While Schwarzenegger Looks Cool Spoofing Himself

June 28, 2015, 7:07 am

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The Anomaly (2014)

I have a lot of respect for Noel Clarke. Sure, like most people I was introduced to him in the role of Mickey in Doctor Who, which wasn't a terribly high note for him. Still I have come to realise that he is a very capable performer (and I was sad to see so little of him in the movie "Heartless".



The Anomaly pushes Noel Clarke to his limits as a central character, but "The Anomaly" is a good little sci-fi story and it's fun to watch Noel Clarke explore it.



Through the story, Clarke continually awakens to find himself in a different scenario and each time he wakes up he discovers new clues to what is happening to him. Like with Memento, the film is showing us the same perspective as the hero.



So what's the catch? Well a few parts of the script are a little hackneyed. There's a posh villain (which they managed to get Brian Cox to play) who rather awkwardly repeats "my dear boy" in his interactions with others. But the real problem is the action scenes. They look incredibly amateurish and, even worse, the filmmakers keep using slow motion effects so we can see the amateurishness even more clearly. Much of the fighting is irrelevant to the plot and it becomes tiresome waiting for these embarrassing set-pieces to end.



This was nearly a really great film, but the filmmakers have allowed the low production values (when it comes to fight sequences) to get the better of them.

C+



Last Action Hero (1993)

In the aftermath of Schwarzenegger's gargantuan success as an action star, there seems to be a greater tendency to dismiss his success. There are plenty of low points to choose from. There's "Batman and Robin", "Jingle All The Way" and of course, now that such a huge number of movies have become available to rent cheaply on DVD, we've all checked out "Hercules In New York" by now.

Still I think it's not stated often enough what a great performer Schwarzenegger became and also what a great sense of comic timing he has.



Here in "Last Action Hero" there are several problems. One is that the movie-within-a-movie is often made so over-the-top and stupid that it just makes the movie we are watching painful to sit through. The 'fart bomb' sequence being a case-in-point.



Another problem is that the central kid is pretty irritating. And sadly another issue I have with this film is the misuse of Ian McKellan. Also this is a comedy where not all the jokes hit the mark.



But one thing that is definitely not a problem is Schwarzenegger. Heck, he kept me on board even through some of the more groan-worthy lines. I also really enjoyed Schwarzenegger's willingness to poke fun at himself.



For anything this movie does wrong, I still it is worth checking out just for the "Hamlet" action movie sequence. There've been plenty of over the top action movie parodies (often featuring Jesus or Gandhi), but none have cracked me up quite as much as this.



Another great scene is Charles Dance's villain character experimenting with murder in the real world. "I have killed a man and wish to confess!"



Overall "Last Action Hero" is too goofy for its own good. It also feels like the filmmakers shot themselves in the foot when they inserted a stereotypical angry police chief dropping an f bomb into what would otherwise be a great movie for a wider (i.e. younger) audience.



As an intelligent film for adults this is seriously lacking and as an action film in its own right, the action scenes aren't all that special.

C+



(video link)

Down To Earth Solid Drama "Mr. Holmes" And Off-Its-Head Nuts Short Film "Kung Fury"

June 30, 2015, 7:40 am

≫ Next: Two Interesting Movies About Weird Parasites. One More Effective Than The Other.

≪ Previous: Noel Clarke Looks Silly As An Action Hero, While Schwarzenegger Looks Cool Spoofing Himself

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Mr Holmes (2015)

Look at Bill Conden's IMDB page and the first thing most people will recognise is probably the two "Breaking Dawn" Twilight films. But that's a pity since there's a real gem there in "Gods and Monsters", a film about the retired director James Whale, played by Ian McKellan.



Now these two work together again, this time with McKellan playing an elderly version of a fictional character: Sherlock Holmes.



While the film starts out rather dry, it's always interesting. As the film progresses it turns out that absolutely everything is connected. This is a film about loneliness, relationships with parents, regrets, and about being able to see beyond petty first impressions.



The other major characters are Sherlock's new housekeeper and her inquisitive son. The son is played expertly by Milo Parker. (The housekeeper has a long successful career including Truman's wife in "The Truman Show")



There are genuine mysteries which are pretty clever, but what marks them out from other recent Sherlock Holmes adaptations is the depth of humanity behind them. This is far from the cold calculating Holmes we might be used to in BBC's Sherlock.



This is a fantastic drama with engaging performances, intelligently written, with a smart storyline. In less capable hands this could have all felt very inconsequential. Essentially this is, after all, about a retired Sherlock Holmes in wavering health doing a bit of beekeeping and trying to show off to a substitute for a grandchild. But instead, thanks to the wonderful well-directed performances it strikes at the heart. There are no fist fights, gunfights, street chases or explosions, but we don't need anything like that because the character work is so dramatic all by itself.

A+



Kung Fury (2015)

Sure it's only a short film, but with its frantic pacing and non-stop ridiculousness I think something longer would have become tiresome. At 30 minutes this is just the right length.



Last year I checked out a Scandinavian spy movie spoof called Norwegian Ninja. It was fun in similar ways, but it was full movie length and wasn't so frenetic.



The soundtrack is mostly by Mitch Murder, one of these New Retro style artists that have been gaining popularity since the release of the movie "Drive".



This style of music and the movie "Kung Fury" have a lot in common. The music takes a synthy sound which draws on nostalgia for the 80s and 90s, but uses it to produce something very obviously from the 2010s. The movie does the same thing with its visuals. We get a whole mixture of ideas. Kung Fury gets his power from being struck by lightning (Short Circuit), he goes back in time (Back To The Future/The Terminator), comes across dinosaurs (Jurassic Park) and when later fighting Nazis the action happens on a 2D plane of movement until one Nazi gets his spine ripped out (Mortal Kombat - the videogame). So many ideas that characterise movies and games in the 80s and 90s all shoved together to make something beyond what we've ever really seen before.



I'm reminded of Joseph Kahn's movie "Detention". (Clapton Davis!) It's a style which can feel too frantic for some people (and certainly Kung Fury doesn't worry about the same kind of character moments which Detention works in, so if you didn't like Detention you'll probably loathe Kung Fury). "Scott Pilgrim Vs The World" also had set-pieces which used this same kind of brightly coloured frenetic style.



Perhaps next someone can find a way to take all this crazy frenetic mash-up stuff and use it to make something unique and original which works as a new groundbreaking series in its own right. I suppose the nearest to that right now might well be Freddie W's "Video Game High School" online series.



"Kung Fury" is currently available for free on Youtube. Even if you don't like it, it's short at just half an hour. Don't miss out. Find out what the hype is all about!

A+

Two Interesting Movies About Weird Parasites. One More Effective Than The Other.

July 2, 2015, 4:20 pm

≫ Next: Daredevil TV Show: Great Series, But The Finale Has Some Problems...

≪ Previous: Down To Earth Solid Drama "Mr. Holmes" And Off-Its-Head Nuts Short Film "Kung Fury"

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Honeymoon (2014)

Invasion Of The Body Snatchers (the original black and white version) is one of my favourite sci-fi films of all time. Based on the novel "The Puppet Masters", it has inspired and influenced an enormous number of films and stories about alien possessions or insipid takeovers. John Carpenter's "The Thing", "They Live", "The Faculty", "Almost Human" and Edgar Wright's "The World's End" all make use of this concept.



And now we have this indie movie "Honeymoon". We're actually never told that this is a story about aliens. In fact, part of the strength of this movie and the concept in general is the possibility that perhaps that more paranoid character is the crazy one.



One really awkward criticism I have to make, even though I feel picky doing so, is.about the accents. Now I am not saying the accents are bad. Honestly I wouldn't know. But the issue is that these British actors are so recognisable to me that I can't help but imagine them using their regular voices, making their American accents in the film seem especially odd and frustrating. It doesn't help that they are practically the only characters in the film.



The actors in question are Rose Leslie, Jon Snow's wildling girlfriend from Game of Thrones, and Harry Treadaway, one of the twins in "Brothers Of The Head". (It turns out that it was actually his brother who played the posh comic relief pothead from "Attack The Block".) While I know neither of these actors from a particularly wide range of roles, they are both extremely charming, even with distracting American accents.



One opinion I've heard is that the movie "Honeymoon" has no twist. I've heard some claim that the ending is unsatisfying. I cannot possibly agree. For me the final scenes, while not providing blatant exposition, reveal quite explicitly how earlier scenes have misled us and why. Still the film also maintains decent and well-planned subtle ideas and themes.



It seems that "Honeymoon" is something of a Marmite movie. Some may find it simplistic, or confusing, or boring. I'm not sure what the complaints are really, because for me this was a wonderfully crafted addition to a genre of which I am particularly fond.

A+



Splinter (2008)

On the one hand the performances are very decent. On the other hand the characters are complete idiots. I guess that's the better way around, but I couldn't help but feel irritated by some of the odd decisions by this group.



There's nothing terribly groundbreaking here. The camera shakes and quick cuts to avoid showing the monster, but we also have some disjointed close-ups of the monster-slime as it seems to bubble and form spikes (or splinters). It's a neat effect, but it's really not a terribly interesting monster concept.



Oh, your arm is turning black and looking really dodgy? Better not tell anyone about that! Ah, the monster recognises human body temperature? Well I guess the best option us making a run for it while extremely cold! ('Cause those two things won't conflict, will they?)



I like the performances and I quite like the effects and the film is engaging enough. This had potential to be a lot better. Sadly the final product is just rather cheesy and stupid.

C+